Trump Caught his Own Virus

Photo by mana5280 on Unsplash

Americans scrambled for foodstuffs, toilet paper, masks, and anything else that might get us through the pandemic. We banded together at appropriate social distance. We tuned in to hear Dr. Fauci explain what this virus was and how we could keep ourselves safe. We home-schooled our children and telecommuted or — in many cases — lost our jobs and faced possible eviction. And Trump? What did he do?

He called it a hoax.

When Obama left office he left a book, an actual book of procedures to follow if a super contagious and deadly disease broke out. In office he had dealt with SARS and Ebola and, being a responsible stand up guy who actually won his elections plural, he wanted to leave something to help the next President in the very likely event that another zoonotic plague broke out.

Oh, but don’t you know, Obama’s black so that detailed book compiled by experts in the fields and tested on multiple would be epidemics is no good. Trump ignored it.

Some Americans agreed with Trump and so they went to his huge and pointless rallies and refused to wear masks and got up in people’s faces. And as a result of their actions more people who might not have caught this deadly virus did. Instead of making the rallies virtual or encouraging social distancing, Trump did the exact opposite.

Dumbkirk or the perfect metaphor for Trump, his family, his campaign, and his Presidency. (Photo found here.)

Trump even went further. He sent broken ventilators to California, he had PPE confiscated and resold, and he tried to force mayors and governors to lift quarantine restrictions prematurely. He’s even been trying since the beginning of his Presidency to dismantle the ACA.

Vaccine studies are showing promise and underway, but the process is still laborious and requires a great deal of precaution before distribution.

Of late, he’s been promising that a vaccine will be available to all Americans by November but that’s not physically, medically, or chemically possible. It is possible that somehow the research labs hit on the magical combination that gets you a working vaccine with no more side effects than bruising or soreness in the first instance, but they still need to go through all the appropriate testing to prove that before giving it to vulnerable Americans and they have to actually manufacture and distribute it all of which takes time.

Trump’s actions have directly resulted in the unnecessary deaths of over 200,000 Americans. That is more Americans than died several of our wars.

So why did he do this? Is he just stupid and incompetent? Well, yes, but also politics and racism.

This virus happens to kill people with weakened immune and cardiovascular systems with more frequency than it does super healthy people. Aside from just disregarding the nice Black guy’s book on how not to die, Trump was told that people of colour, people who’s immune and cardiovascular systems are weakened as a result of dealing with the stress of constant racist assaults and inequity, were dying at a higher rate than white people. So Trump decided he didn’t care. He figured this was the Holocaust he didn’t have to pay for. And once all the people of colour were dead he’d have an easy time being re-elected.

So he politicized masks. He politicized them so much that at the public whipping of Chris Wallace that was the Presidential debate on Tuesday, his family did not wear masks despite the debate being hosted by an actual hospital.


As a friend says, “play stupid games, win stupid prizes.” Wednesday, advisor to the President and weird incestuous surrogate daughter, Hope Hicks tested positive for COVID-19. She had been in close contact with Trump even travelling on Airforce 1 with him and speaking with him sans mask. She started showing symptoms at one of his rallies. Trump and Clara Petacci were immediately quarantined awaiting test results and we have heard today that they both tested positive.

Melania was seated wearing a mask, but she promptly removed it.

Melania has a reasonable chance of surviving this. Donald however is an obese septuagenarian with high cholesterol and a likely history of stroke. His outlook is … well it would be grim if he weren’t directly responsible for 200,000 and more deaths. He’s showing symptoms which are as of writing mild, but people his age don’t tend to do well with this infection. According to the CDC the risks of hospitalization and death for those infected with this virus increase exponentially with age.

There is a reasonable chance that even this close to the next term Trump may die in office and there’s a better than average chance that he will not be able to campaign for the rest of the election.

Donald Trump’s possible impending death is really great for the United States of America and our democracy because it means we don’t have to worry about the precedent of prosecuting an ex-President for his crimes and it nullifies Trump’s attempts to steal the 2020 election. The GOP could still try to steal it for Pence if Trump does die, but it would be a pointless gesture. It would be as if the Nazis tried to keep it up for Himmler.

Anyway, you can pray for his recovery if you want, but I’ll save my prayers for the families of those who might have been saved.

Doctor of Palaeopathology, rage-prone optimist, stealth berserker, opera enthusiast, and insatiable consumer of academic journals.

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