I remember going through this myself as a kid. First thing’s first, as white people we’re always going to be privileged and therefore a little racist. Based on what you’ve written you know this and to fight against it. So that’s good, but I’m not confident in saying you can definitely raise your daughter to not be racist.

And this is because you’re not the only person raising your daughter.

She’s being told or shown in school and by society how to behave. Some of it’s good and some of it’s … so racist. This might not work for your kid and it’s pretty extreme, but I’ll tell you what my parents did for me. I’m half-Hungarian and my great-grandfather spent WWII helping prisoners escape from trains. (As I understand it, those that crossed through Hungary were headed for the extermination camps. My great-grandfather was handsome with a German last name and so the Nazis trusted him which gave him the opportunity to save a few people.) But my parents put me in a Catholic school where there was a heavy HEAVY dose of anti-Semitism before I knew where I came from. I parroted those views all of once and my parents introduced me to the Holocaust. Also, a friend of my mothers’ was a retired cardiac surgeon who’d gone into medicine because he was a Holocaust survivor and my mom basically countered the anti-Semitism I was getting at school by sending me to him.

You can’t escape racism and racism for white people is heady as hell because it promises us everything and threatens us with being treated like “others” if we don’t engage in it.

If you keep challenging those racist beliefs she’s being taught by society and give her time with people like Ms. Keisha who can be role models for her I think that might be the best you can do. I wish I had a simple solution for you. Children soak up so much information from everywhere and some things they just can’t understand yet.

Doctor of Palaeopathology, rage-prone optimist, stealth berserker, opera enthusiast, and insatiable consumer of academic journals.

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