How Very Dare She Enjoy Her Ice Cream

or How to Disguise your Misogyny as Wokeness

How dare she have refrigerator! She should keep her ice cream in the snow banks or in a cave filled with ice like real Americans! Why is she not hunting and salting venison for the long winter?? She should be weaving salmon nets so that we may eat the flesh of fish during Lent.

A few days ago the first female Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, engaged in a bit of public outreach and opened her freezer to show off her collection of ice cream. Immediately, there was an outpouring of extreme hatred. How very dare a woman who routinely states how much she enjoys ice cream and chocolate have ice cream and chocolate. She had *gasp* chocolate ice cream. The gall! The temerity! The decadence! Clearly, the Speaker must be corrupt, spending some of her salary on ICE CREAM. A woman should not spend her money on ice cream!!! How dare she have a sweet tooth! Or earn money! Or eat food! Or exist!

Normally, attacks on Nancy Pelosi are easily dismissed because they’re all pretty clearly misogynist and all from Republicans. This attack was still misogynist, in fact, it is extremely misogynist, but it didn’t come primarily from the GOP. Republicans attacked over the use of dijon mustard and arugula but they don’t usually take issue with ice cream. No, this particular incident of extremist sexism and pathological misogyny came from people who not only aren’t Republicans but who call themselves “progressive.” (Note: you can’t be progressive and get mad at a woman for having ice cream. So if this was you you’re not liberal.)

The “logic” is that the ice cream in question is no ordinary ice cream but gourmet. *faints* It costs $9 a pint at the San Francisco Safeway nearest to where Pelosi likely lives. The horror. And worse, on the website you can order it in a box of 6 pints for $12 a per pint! And other ice creams like Haagen Daas, Magnum, or Ben and Jerry’s cost about the same or are more expensive!! How DARE the America’s first woman Speaker of the House enjoy moderately priced gourmet ice cream!! It is a slap in the face to rich white folks who don’t wash their legs!

Bourgeoisie excess available here for $12.

Anyways, it’s pretty obvious why Republicans have always tried to tear down Nancy Pelosi. She’s a liberal juggernaut. Pelosi is the reason Democrats have made any legislative progress at all. If there’s a bill that’s passed Congress that you like Pelosi was probably the…